O goodness, you sure have been through it! I to have lost children but never could carry any, so I have no children. I would eat too.. well I can say; I too had a by pass jan 10th and all my doctors say this....portion control is what gets the weight off! now I can tell you this the doctors put me on protien shakes! 3 -8 oz glasses a day [ curbs that hunger] now they make that in all flavors..if you love sweets this helps b/c it is sweet. I am on the protien shakes and I eat veggies as much as I want with 2 fruits a day" I drink water no pop or anything just water" you have to be careful with fruit there is sugar. in one month I have lost 35 lbs! hope this helps. Nan